So last week, I showed you how to use your child to save money on a gym membership.
This week, I’m going to show you how allowing your child eat like a half-blind barbarian can be fantastically entertaining, and thus, there’s no real reason to ever teach your child how to consume food in a civilized, socially acceptable manner.
Observe (while ignoring the terrible cell phone photo quality…DSLR fund is now up to about $5.24. Impressive, right?).
Start with a nice empty mouth.
The bowl is a little to your left, buddy.
Little bit further left…
No, the shiny part is where the food goes.
Alright, we’ve got one hand on each end of the fork. This is progress.
The logical way to eat: take the noodles out of the bowl, eat them off the table with the fork.
When all else fails, bring the noodles to the fork.
Shovel it all in there at once. No manners required.
Throw the fork on the floor.
Tastes kind of like your hand, huh?
I just keep winning at parenting. All for the benefit of the masses, of course.
I paid no attention whatsoever to the eating tutorial because I was completely smitten with your adorable son. HE’S SO CUTE!!
Thank you! I can’t believe he turned two today. I cried while I was singing Happy Birthday. In front of all our guests. It was embarrassing.